Monster me?

You ever have one of those moments where a particularly odd thought comes into your mind, lays it eggs, hatches, begins to grow, and by the time it matures your perspective seems to have flopped upside down?

Well as you may have guessed that has happened to me. I know, and have known, that I am a sinner. I also know it is easier to see the sin in other people, but the part of my perception that really got flopped upside down is how horrible I really am at seeing other's sins. As a person I tend to evaluate in my head how I think other people are doing in their lives, mostly spiritually. I know I could never truly know the inside of a man, for only the spirit inside him can! Still I would evaluate people spiritually and it's funny that I just realized the other day that almost every time my evaluation is directly linked to how that person acts towards me! If they have been kind and receptive towards me I view them as a person who is looking out for others and caring, but if they are rude to me or annoyed with me I think they are in the wrong and must be struggling spiritually!

I know this sounds so perverse, first of all that I judge others spiritually is probably bad enough, though we are called to consider our brothers and often my intent in that is to try and encourage them. But I realize now that I am really just trying to boost my self esteem, telling myself that if they don't like me or care for me it's because they don't love God. It's time for me to face facts, a person can have a wonderful relationship with God and not be in love with me! I see the rouge selfishness that I possess and I realize why it can be so detrimental for me to judge the spiritual states of others!

This thought was really helped along by a post my brother made on his blog a few days ago about Jesus saying "I desire mercy not sacrifice". I know this sounds like me trying to advertise my brother's blog but since I am convinced he is the only one who reads this thing, and maybe my sister, this would be about the least effective advertisement ever! So anyways, his blog is anotheroneinthedark.blogspot.com and you should really check it out!!!

I am praying that the Lord would help me be discerning in my view of others, not ignorant but also not condemning!

Gossip? Love?

Today I sat in my dorm and watched a basketball game with about 6 other guys in my dorm. Seeing how we interacted with each other in that setting made me again question the behavior we proclaim as acceptable.

First, I think mostly we think gossip to be a problem with women alone. Partially this is because women do love to know what is going on in others lives and it's true that often girls gossip because of that. Also this is partially thought because women are more sensitive so when they are talked about behind their back it seems to hurt them more. But today I sat and heard, for probably 20 minuets, what I would consider gossip and it was completely accepted by the guys. I know I am often the problem but I also tend to get very uneasy when we say anything about a person that is not flattering when they aren't around. I guess the question I have is why do those things need to be said? Is it really something that builds up, is it loving to the person who you are talking about?
Not even that, but it seems to me that gossip is also unloving to the person you are talking to because you are giving them a poor view of the person you are speaking about!

It has been hard, but I am trying to figure out where that line is between just joking around and actually slandering someone! So I leave it open for debate, let me know what you think... where is the line? what is gossip? what is slandering a brother? and when do we just need to take a joke for a joke and toughen up?

Secondly, there are certain guys in the dorm who from the moment they step into the room to the second they leave guys just rip on their every word. Here I struggle more but even though I'm part of the problem it's not hard to see that it is a problem. Where is the love? I mean I know that these guys can get on our nerves from time to time but it's not as though they have done anything terrible! Nothing certainly deserving of mockery! What ever happened to coming along side of someone in love and trying to show them when they are doing something that can get on people's nerves rather than mentally gang beating them?

Lastly I want to say that I have a lot of respect for the guys I am talking about in many ways, but just what seems to be acceptable to most all of us seems to be rather unbiblical! Please leave you comments and let me know if you feel that I have been irrational in this post!

My room, or my mirror?

I pulled up the blinds today, I opened the window. Yes, you read that right, I am writing this post to tell you that I pulled up the blinds in my dormitory room today, that I opened up the window.
It seems like forever I've been making unhealthy choices in my life. Every time I turned around this last week it was to the wake of another failure in discipline, another unwise decision. Slowly, but surely, that knotty feeling in my stomach began to gain its control on me until I was so weak that I had not the energy to fight it anymore. I began missing classes, staying up way to late, and just drowning in my own self worry, or pity, I'm not sure which one it was. Either way it was like trying to get myself out of the muck: the more I fought the weaker I became and the deeper I would sink until finally I was completely submerged! That submersion was this afternoon where my laziness and sin hit its peak!
As I laid there on my couch, feeling as though I was completely defeated, I put on a John Piper sermon and it was as if God opened my eyes to where I was. I saw myself, I was sitting on a couch in a dark room with stale air. Funny how parallel the conditions of my dorm room were to my actual spiritual state. I kept my dorm room shades down, window closed, blocking out sunlight and cool fresh air. So also I, a hopeless sinner who has been freed from his slavery to sin has been subjecting myself to that same dark sin. I have been given glorious light Hallelujah!!! But in my laziness, and my lustfulness, and my selfishness, I have been pulling down the blinds on my heart, I have been closing the refreshing windows to my soul! How terrible and unimaginable that I would do such a thing!
I've seen it's affect on my life already, I have been pushing friends away so that I can be alone in my darkness. I have been hurting my relationship with my girlfriend with my desire for the unhealthy rather than the healthy. I even got a speeding ticket the other night for my disregard of the law. I am struggling to do homework, I miss classes too. Most of all I have disregarded my prayer life and my time spent studying the sweet Word of God!
God showed me that today! Thank you Jesus for showing me that today! Both I, and my dorm room, were wonderfully saved from our subjection to darkness and stagnity today! I know this doesn't mean I won't struggle anymore, but God has affected my heart with His Gospel today, He grabbed me in that muck and pulled me out while I was drowning! I know I will still struggle, but today my conscience was reawakened and it bears strongly on my heart! My heart began to beat as the light and the wind of the gospel ravished it! And now I echo with David, "May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing in your sight, my rock and my redeemer!" (Ps. 19:14)

Round 1 Comments

After posting my first round yesterday I would like to make a few notes about it...

First of all, I do have reasons for every pick I made, but just felt it too overwhelming to write them all on here. I must admit though, my decision making was heavily influenced 3 other mock drafts which I consider trustworthy. I saw their picks, read their reasoning, and also took heavily into account team needs to make up my picks.

Secondly, and more importantly, some notes on the draft itself. I don't think Keith Rivers will actually fall to the Texans, but they might just pee themselves if he does! Once I decided Buffalo wouldn't take him no team till the Texans had enough of a need at the position for me to predict him going there. Still with that being said, I think he is too much of a talent at the position, especially when I don't see great depth at outside linebacker, for one of those teams before the Texans not to take him. I just can't predict which team. Most of my picks were made based on needs and not as heavily on talent.

Third, I know it was a surprise, and probably unrealistic, to have Dorsey and Ellis going 9 and 10, but for now that's what I see happening. Also I hope I am wrong about the Raiders picking McFadden.

Round 1

Well The time is now, I will pound out the first 32, oh I forgot the Patriots are idiots, 31 pics of the draft!

Miami-Chris Long
St. Louis-Vernon Gholston
Atlanta-Jake Long
Oakland-Daren McFadden
Kansas City-Ryan Clady
New York Jets-Leodis McKelvin
New England-Dominique Rogers-Cromartie
Baltimore-Matt Ryan
Cincinnati-Glen Dorsey
New Orleans-Cedrick Ellis
Buffalo-Mike Jenkins
Denver-Chris Williams
Carolina-Brian Brohm
Chicago-Jeff Otah
Detroit-Rashard Mendenhall
Arizona-Aqib Talib
Minasota-Derek Harvey
Houston-Keith Rivers
Philadelpia-Malcom Kelly
Tampa Bay-DeSean Jackson
Washington-Phillip Merling
Dalas-Limas Sweed
Pittsburgh-Brandon Albert
Tennessee-Devin Thomas
Seattle-Kentwan Balmer
Jacksonville-Lawrence Jackson
San Diego-Gosder Cherilus
Dallas-Anton Casoine
San Fransico-James Hardy
Green Bay-Reggie Smith
New England-Idiots
New York Giants-Kenny Philips

NFL thoughts

So I will just keep this short with a few thoughts I have about current NFL news, especially some draft thoughts!

First, and most exciting, my heart leapt for joy as an NFL draft analyst talked about what he sees the Buffalo Bills doing with their #11 draft pick. Believe it or not, Charles Davis has the Bills picking Michigan State's standout wide receiver Devin Thomas!!! Needless to mention that he is my favorite prospect this year! Also I should add that I have always had a warm spot in my heart for the Buffalo Bills! it is probably my favorite place to see him go that is actually looking for a wide out. I mean the Steelers would be better, but they won't pick wideout till round three, if at all.
In case you do not believe me, check it out for yourself!
http://www.nfl.com/videos?videoId=09000d5d807346e9

Secondly, I want to pose the question of why in the world did the Lions release Kevin Jones? I wish they would think about the fact that they have a horrid offensive line and stop trying to focus solely on skill positions! The only way this makes sense to me is if the Lions are going to draft a running back in the first two rounds! If this is so, I like the Lions to take a second round RB, and get a first round tackle, if one of the big four are left. I do have to admit I don't know much about who is on the Lion's offensive line, but it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know they arn't very good! There is good depth at running back, and I think it would be great to see them pick up a guy like Jamaal Charles or Matt Forte. Charles played in a tough conference but pounded out around 1600 yards in it this last year, while Forte played at Tulane and faced no great competition. Still any guy who puts up 2100+ gets good recognition in my book, and he has good size, something a Lions running back needs. Also add into the mix that the last Texas running back (and Charles is from Texas) seems to have been a bit of a flop, Cedric Benson. It may even be possible for Detroit to get Forte in the 3rd round as he is slated somewhere in there right now!

Third, although I know I said I would like to see the Lions pick up Matt Forte, I want to say that I really like the thought of the Steelers picking up Matt Forte in the third round! I doubt this though considering the fact that the Steelers picked up Mwelde Moore from the Vikings.

For now that is it, I am off to spring break but maybe sometime soon I will post the rest of my first round of picks!

Must See Farewell

I couldn't figure out how to get this video to show on here, so I just will give you the link, Here is Brett Farve's farewell! So humble! So passionate!

http://www.nfl.com/videos?videoId=09000d5d80713c5b

D-Day: The Next Five Picks!

Posting last night gave me an new invigorating way to express my young growing knowledge of the NFL draft. So I find myself here again today, ready to make and talk about my 6-10 draft picks. It should be noted that these projections do not take into account picks that will most likely be traded. This is a projection made as if picks could not be traded.



6 NY Jets- Vernon Gholston
To me this makes sense in every way! Jets play the 3-4, Gholston would thrive as an outside linebacker in that sort of a system. He could also contribute greatly as a defensive end if they needed! I noticed near the end of the season, especially after their off week, the Jets began to move guys around during the snap count. The Steelers began this style of defense and the Patriots now utilize this strategy also. Since the Jets used it successfully you can expect them to want to do more of that! Gholston would be perfect with that scheme, possessing a unique blend of speed, size, and agility!
The Jets were 9th against the pass last year but 29th against the run, so one may wonder why pick a pass rusher here? Gholston is way underrated in his run stopping ability. He put up 37 reps in the bench press at the combine, the same amount as premiere OT Jake Long. That proves he has the ability to take on a strong blocker and his speed show that he will have the ability to eliminate the corner on run plays.
A final thought, it would be interesting to see him playing on the same linebacker squad as David Harris, their outstanding rookie linebacker from Michigan!
A post final thought... I didn't dare put Matt Ryan here because I haven't seen anyone else doing that... but I don't understand why not. I looked at their QB's and I see that Kellen Clements is terrible! Why not grab a good QB?

7New England- Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie
I know this may be the first place you will see DRC going before Mckelvin, Talib, and Jenkins, but I think this is the way Belichick will go. DRC is a rare athlete at 6'1" he is good height for a corner, but to run a 4.33 at that height is sick good! On top of that he has good hands, and good instincts. Did I mention that he put up a 38.5 inch vertical? The only knocks I've heard on him is his tackling and the small school he played for. The small school doesn't bother me much, Cornerbacks don't seem to bothered by that and a summer of practicing with NFL receivers will cure him. As for the hitting, I didn't see the senior bowl, but I heard he showcased his hitting and tackling ability! If this is true, Belichick would love to get an athletic phenom like DRC to replace Asante Samuels.

8 Baltimore- Matt Ryan
Any other year I would have Matt Ryan down as a second rounder, but in this draft he looks to be a top ten pick because there is no better quarter back, next years QB prospects don't look any better, and the Ravens are just so stinking desperate. It's no secret that the Kyle Boller experiment failed. The Ravens have never had a solid QB. They are in the position to take one here, and bolster their wide receivers in the second and third round. They can focus on the pass game like this because I believe them to be a good team that just played really poorly in the pass game last year. Also comparisons have been made between Matt Ryan and Ben Roethlisberger. After getting pounded by Big Ben last year, they may see the value in having that type of QB on their team.
I would like to mention that I find this comparison to have some validity, Big Ben is much more tough and that is one of the things that makes him unique. Also Big Ben didn't struggle with throwing interceptions in college like Matt Ryan has.

9Cincinati- Keith Rivers
This pick is difficult also, I can see them going after a DE since there are many good ones and they just lost Smith to free agency. Still I think with all the trouble they had at linebacker last year they go with the best OLB in the draft. Rivers dominated at the Senior Bowl showing he can get to the QB and pursue a running back. Best of all he had good fundamentals when covering TEs and RBs, a lost art on many linebackers. In the end Rivers is a nice fit for the Bengals.

10New Orleans- Leodis McKelvin
McKelvin could very well go before this, but I believe the saints take him here. He is a physical corner who will jam a receiver and help in run support! He runs a sub 4.4 in the 40. If not for his struggles with catching the ball he would easily be the best CB in the draft. The Saints need so much help right now that they can't be picking guys for their hands but rather for their ability to help with pass and run.

A few notes at the end of this post...

1. I do believe the saints picked up Randle Gay in Free Agency, still I believe they will look for another CB in the first round.
2. Though I doubt Chad Henne will be drafted till the mid to late second round, possibly as the 4th QB, I think he will lead the best career of all the QB prospects this year.
3. I saw in a few mock drafts that some people think the Steelers will look RB in the first round since Parker is coming off a serious late season injury and Davenport as the feature back. I thought that was possible even with the glaring OL needs, but the Steelers picked up Mewelde Moore on the free agent market. I know what you must be thinking... Who in the world is Mewelde Moore? He is a balanced running back from the Vikings who was actually quiet effective in the limited time he saw in Minisota. For his career, Moore has 1,285 rushing yards on 264 attempts (4.9 avg.) with one rushing touchdown. He also has 116 receptions for 1,093 yards (9.4 avg.) with three touchdowns. As a returner, Moore has returned 74 punts for 768 yards (10.4 avg.) with two touchdowns and 26 kickoffs for 503 yards (19.3 avg.).

For now that is it! Hope you enjoy! I would tell you to leave a comment but since I have no doubt that Ben is the only one reading this, I'll just say thanks for reading!

Mere Talk

Proverbs 14:23

All hard work brings a profit,

but mere talk leads only to poverty.



I think that about sums up my last few attempts to blog! I talk like I will be a blogger, but talking alone has led me to poverty in the blogging realm! I had big ideas, and much I wanted to say, but instead of making the effort to continually get on this thing and do it I got excited about what I wanted to do. Oh the folly of a fast tongue and soft hands!



Anyways, seeing as I am already posting I think I will say a thing or two! I am poised to come home and watch the NFL draft with my brother April 26th and 27th. With this hope has come a new found obsession with reading about who young draft prospects are, and where they might go in the draft.



First I want to list my first five picks in order, and then mention a few notes on players that may be of interest.



Miami- Chris Long

The Dolphins need a safe pick, a guy with character who has the skill and work ethic to be an impact player for years into the future since they have a LONG ways to go. Luckily for them Chris Long is ready to make a huge impact immediately, he had as much class as anyone in NFL history, and he is a workout freak! It also helps that he is a natural leader who will make all those around him better! Chris should fit perfectly with the Dolphins, especially if Jason Taylor decides to retire!

Some say that Chris has hit the ceiling on his talent. That was said of him last year also, and look at how much better he has become. Also this is not that much of a knock seeing as he is the kind of guy who can come in and get 13 sacks his first season... it's hard to get much better than that!



St. Louis- Sedrick Ellis
It might be a surprise to see me put Sedrick Ellis here, I did consider Vernon Gohlston and Jake Long, but honestly I think this makes a lot of sense. Dorsey would fit here too, but I would think taking a man who has been that injury plagued this early is far too risky. Ellis is only a slightly lesser talent and he has the potential to last 5 to 7 seasons beyond Dorsey. Last year the rams drafted Adam Carriker the defensive end in the first round. This season though they had to play him at DT. With this pick they would be able to move him back to DE, his most effective position. Also they have Glover at DT, at 33 years he is beginning to grow a nice full grey beard.
I wouldn't be surprised at all to see Jake Long going to the Rams at this point either.

Atlanta- Jake Long
Atlanta, like Miami, have a myriad of problems, none of which will be over soon. They also need a guy with long term ability, and more than any other team in the league they need a guy with superb character! Jake long provides both with a strong leadership quality. Many want to put Matt Ryan here, but Atlanta needs to build a line this year so that they can begin to develop a QB in the next few years. Also after picking up Micheal Turner, the best running back in free agency, the Falcons will want to bolster up the line to give him some running lanes.
Though I think it would be the wrong choice, they may go with Matt Ryan here, and wait to pick up a second tier tackle in the second round.

Oakland- Darren Mcfadden
I can only explain this with two words: Al Davis. As sure as the Lions picking a WR, Al Davis will pick the flashiest player in the draft. Darren Mcfadden fits that here. It should be noted though that though this may help the Raiders a little, they have many other more pressing needs.

Kansas City- Glenn Dorsey
The Chiefs are like a bob cat crouched and ready to pounce if Jake Long is still on the board. Since that is not the case they go with the unique athleticism of Glenn Dorsey. In spite of all the fears of injury, the Chiefs need DT and Dorsey is a monster of a DT. Also there is not much depth at DT, after Dorsey and Ellis there is a huge drop off. Kentwan Balmer and Trever Laws are good but not immediate impact guys.

So there you have my temporary top five. I think the hardest pick is the Rams, I can see them going so many ways. I also wanted to add a few comments about the draft before I end this rather long post.

1. Devin Thomas! This beast is rising the charts after putting up 1200+ plus yards for the Michigan State Spartans! He also ran a sub 4.4 forty time at the combine and is 6-2 215ish! Size, speed, production! I think he would be a great fit for the Skins or the 49er's in the first round. Some may say that is too high and it is unreasonable, but I would like to say that some experts this week have began to slide him into the late first round! One with the Titans, one with the 49ers. Mike Mayock, NFL.com's premiere draft specialist has him ranked 3rd among WR prospects!
2. I am desperately hoping that Jeff Otah or Chris Williams fall to the Steelers on draft day! I look for the steelers to pick tackle round one, guard round two! Though in round two, if Deven Thomas happens to be around, I wouldn't mind seeing the best team in NFL history pick him up!

Well that's it for now, leave me a comment or two! Even if it is to tell me how boring this post was!